Nowadays, our Instagram feeds are filled with reels about lighting a candle and taking a relaxing bath, drinking tea on a rainy night while reading a book, and at-home spa days as forms of self-care. Although these may be perfectly adequate to feel good for a couple of hours, maybe even for the rest of the day, they are not sustainable and truly effective forms of caring for ourselves and our mental health. Self-care isn’t just about setting up an aesthetic scene in your bathroom and turning your mind off for a little while; it is about listening to what your body and mind need and healing the wounds created by the stress of our daily lives.
Making time for ourselves in the fast-paced world we live in may seem like a chore or another item on our to-do list, and we may even feel guilty about it since we aren’t being objectively productive. An exceedingly capitalistic society has convinced us that self-care is something we can only practice once we’ve completed every task handed to us and completely burned ourselves out. However, the expectation of constant productivity is unrealistic at best, and, ultimately, our mental well-being is more important than the five minutes of satisfaction we get from finishing the task our boss handed us earlier than we needed to. A few simple ways to begin practicing true self-care include:
- (Re)Connecting with our community: Self-care is often packaged online as an activity to be conducted in complete solitude and silence. In fact, engaging with those we love and enjoy the company of can be an essential part of caring for ourselves. Surrounding ourselves with people who fill our cup rather than drain it can be incredibly healing and prove to be an unexpected form of caring for oneself.
- Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness is another misunderstood topic in self-care. Although yoga and meditation are important ways of practicing mindfulness, there are a myriad of other simple ways to be mindful. Giving ourselves the space to let our thoughts flow freely in silence, mindful eating, listening to our favorite songs, journaling, or even filling out coloring pages can be ways to practice mindfulness for beginners. An important aspect of beginning to practice mindfulness is avoiding multitasking and being keenly aware of what you are doing in a specific moment.
- Asking for help: In an increasingly individualistic society, asking for help seems nearly impossible. Asking for help, whether from a professional or from a friend, makes us feel like a tremendous burden. However, asking for help is an essential way of leaning on our community and building a reliable support system for ourselves. Rather than viewing reaching out as a weakness, we must understand that humans are inherently social beings meant to lean on one another to thrive.
- Learning to say “no”: Setting boundaries in our lives with work, friends, or family can be extremely challenging. Sometimes, when we give ourselves the ability to say no to an event we don’t have to go to or an extra work duty we don’t have to perform, we actively make time and space to care for ourselves. Though the fear of missing out on something important can often seem daunting, we must listen to our bodies and minds and recognize when we’ve pushed ourselves too far and just need a break.
- Engaging in hobbies: We often find it difficult to make time for hobbies and things we truly love to do. These may often seem frivolous and like a waste of time when they don’t achieve anything for us. Making time to engage in activities that bring us true joy is a way to show up for ourselves.
These are hardly all the techniques one can engage in to practice self-care, but can be an important first step towards heeding the needs of our mind and body. This means that self-care can look however we want it to look at a given moment in time; what matters is that we are giving ourselves a moment to take a break. Self-care is, as a matter of fact, a form of resistance against an efficiency-driven, capitalistic, hyperindustrialised society. Thus, we must learn to radically care for ourselves and make time and space for our well-being in order to push back against the constant noise and pace of our everyday lives.
